I have been working on this too. The current dev version of 0.8 has a fix for using a texture for emitter color, but in order to get enough useful light you lose being able to see the colors. I have some other ideas about how to fake this and will keep you posted. I'll also post some of my tests when I get a chance.
this is a big great start... you are near the reality.... are you using the new "glossy translucent" mat for the wax?
EDIT: here a texture pack I made in gimp for 3ds max... I take as reference for the images the tutorial of fryrender... the contained maps are for 2 geometries of the flame! a inner and a outer. hope someone find it useful... at time I can't test the candle... due mat limitation of LUXmax.